17 February 2013

The Esteemed Self

I don't know where this came from. It's one of those times when I can't control the words. They flow like water from a breached levee. Sometimes I notice something that I feel like others notice but can't quite articulate. Much of this may sound cliche or trite, but it isn't. What I have to write is immensely, vastly important. There is almost no way to write this as a male and not sound like I am pandering to females for my own self-aggrandizement.

There are so many girls out there who are desperately seeking to be noticed. So many girls looking for validation in the wrong places, so many rebelling against any and all labels placed upon them, so many that languish in relative obscurity and a daily sense of smallness. I hear their silent screams. I follow their blogs, I look at their uploaded pictures, I read their statuses. And it makes me want to weep for all my powerlessness to do anything about it. If I could tell all the women in the world one thing, it would be: You have worth. It is an intrinsic, inborn, irrefutable worth. And it is immense.

You do not need to have this worth validated by any social, familial, or male groups. If I had the voice, I would shout this from the rooftops; if I had the courage, I would clutch every girl within my grasp and whisper this in their ear; if I had the means, I would start foundations to let every girl know what I know. There is so much more to life than the false hope offered by social media. You deserve more than what your magazines tell you. You are so much more than the narrow picture frames that would trap you. Real men don't want you to look like pornstars and act like immature boys. We want you to be the mothers of our children, our solace in times of trouble, and the sure foundation when the walls around us crumble.

You are wellsprings of power. But make no mistake, this is not power like men have. It is much greater. Not a brute reckless strength, but the innate strength of the hands that have nursed every generation since we began. Your strength waits in an endless reserve of gentle words and caresses. Your strength is not in your iron actions, but your ability to relent, to forgive, to weep, to express emotion. You are brave. Perhaps it is not on the battlefields of great wars, but your bravery is found in silent foxholes of despair where only your consoling embrace can comfort the frightened child, or husband, or stranger. This makes you infinite. This makes you indispensable.

Your body is a temple, respect it. Never apologize for feeling. Run away as fast as you can from any person who makes you feel insignificant, worthless, or anything short of astounding. The same even goes for other girls who make you feel this way. Or any media that does the same. Run away. Run away, and replace it with something positive. There are uplifting things to read, there are better friends out there, and there are some wonderful men out there. (Hint: They are usually not the ones society has programmed you to be attracted to.)

Please women, do not fall to pieces. The rest of us need you too damn much. And in my own insignificant way, I love you all.

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8 comments:

  1. So well said. Thank you for saying what I could not find the words to say, even to myself. I wish I had a father like you.

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  2. This may not have been intended for me, but thank you, DJ. :) I needed to hear that, today (or any day, for that matter).

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  3. Thanks so much for your compliments. I am so glad to know that I helped even a little, and that my thoughts haven't gotten lost in the nothingness that is my little corner of the web. Please continue to share this with everyone you know!

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  4. This is a really amazing post. I just happened to stumble upon it, and I don't know you, but I think it's really comforting as a woman constantly belittled in this society, to see a man who appreciates the value of women as something greater than an object. I think men and women alike lose sight of their worth, as people to be loved, and I think that's where a great deal of sin stems from. I actually wonder if there's any way I can feature this post on my own blog? oliviatalley.blogspot.com

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  5. Thank you! I'm so glad you like it. And please share it! I actually re-posted it twice on facebook so that people would do just that.

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