It is mankind's greatest blessing and greatest curse that every decision is easier made the second time. I find it interesting where "the world" is headed. The world is a loaded word, a generalization for men in society, white men, American men, because I can only speak for them as far as I see it, and even then, only because I am one; thus, quotation marks.
I think Chuck got it right. We are the middle children of history. We are the the fast food generation. Ours is no noble battle, no fight for some righteous cause. We have no reason to live. At least a few hundred years ago men could still be men. Back then, being a man meant chopping down trees on a homestead to literally build a life for yourself and your family. Back then, your worth as a man was decided by how well you could protect and provide for a wife and offspring. Life had purpose, even if that purpose was simply to survive.
What do men build today? What decides a man's worth? Who do we protect? For whom do we provide? What is man's purpose? Why is the white male alive in America? With the easiness of modern life, what is left to live for? What do men have to value?
I can answer these questions, my religion gives me satisfying and fulfilling answers to all of them. But what do others say? (Take this next part lightly) It seems to me that all men build today are stock portfolios and bigger bank statements and beer guts. Man lives his life in a vain pursuit of what he pictures to be contentment. And for the first time in history, society's structure allows him to get at it. It was originally called the American Dream. But this dream is turning into a nightmare, for what does the white male find at the top of the corporate ladder but another rung? He finds that once he has all the things that he thought would bring him contentment, he still feels an empty bed where contentment should be sleeping soundly.
I once went to a party at a mansion in Alpine, UT. The house was enormous. It had everything. Hardwood floors, a library, a gigantic kitchen, a pool. Literally a modern castle. The owner was some lawyer in his late 50's, divorced, and alone. I later came to learn that he invited various groups of young kids to have parties and hang out there. Other people may have seen this as "such a cool thing" and "so generous," but I left feeling bad for the guy. Here was a man who had "everything": a ridiculous car, a giant house, and a boatload of money. He also had no one to share it with. Here was a man with all the trappings of the illusory "modern contentment" who slept alone in a little corner room of a gorgeous home. I couldn't help but feel like I had been used.
We as humans value that which is the hardest to get. For most people, happiness is hardest to get because they equate happiness or contentment with ethereal numbers, notions of wealth that are assured to you by banks and investment firms. They tell you how much money you have, how much you are "worth", but all those numbers will come and go without you ever setting eyes on them. And one day, one day in the near future, all that will collapse like some laughable house of cards we've built. The banks will tell you that you have nothing. When that day comes, you may find that you have nothing left to live for, and that you have squandered your days in frivolous pursuits. You'll wish he hadn't made the same decision the second time, and the time after that. And for all you who doubt the validity of my words, rest assured, Apple is working on a new iPad. So keep working at that job you hate.
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I enjoyed reading this blog post and totally agree with what you had to say.
ReplyDeleteWhen I originally wanted to study German at BYU, people always ask me why I wanted to study German (I wanted to teach German). Then they would always point out that I was crazy for wanting to go into teaching (which doesn't make hardly any money - especially not in Utah) and that I should study something else. Well, I much rather do something that I love and that I am passionate about than a job from hell where I make loads of money but that I totally hate. (Side note: Now that I married a German and I'm living in Germany, I want to teach English as a second language here instead of my original career plan)
It's true - so many people in today's world are really materialistic. They are not grateful for what they have. They always want more and are never satisfied. Because of this never ending craving, I think a lot of people end up buying a lot of things on credit and end up with a lot of debt and unhappiness (or in the case of the Alpine, UT man, really wealthy but unhappy and lonely - with no one to share his "riches" with)
I am reading a really good book right now, Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnach (it's more of a book for women). Yet I like the messages in the book. The book teaches a need for gratitude and simplicity in our lives.
"Gratitude unlocks the fulness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow." - Melody Beattie
One entry that I liked from the book as I am putting our first apartment together:
"When an artist prepares to draw or paint, she carefully considers the balance between both "positive shapes" and "negatives spaces." Positive shapes are the instantly recognizable objects that are rendered on paper or canvas, such as a bowl of fruit in a still life. The negative spaces surround the objects and define them with a boundary. As many artists will tell you, it is far easier to draw the negative spaces between the positive shapes before anything else. That's because, to the eye trained to see beauty, nothing is invisible. What looks empty to the rest of us appears to the artist's eye as full, a complete mystery in its own right. The space surrounding the bowl of fruit is as important as the bowl itself if Wholeness is to emerge.
In the Japanese culture, the negative spaces in art, philosophy, religion, design, business, and life are not thought of as empty but rather as "full of nothing." Richard Tanner Pascale explains in Zen and the Art of Management that the empty spaces are referred to in Japanese as ma, a word for which there is no English translation. To the Western mind this concept is a little hard to grasp. But to the Oriental mind, the empty space is pregnant with possibility, shrouded by the unknown until the time is right for it to be revealed. As the enigmatic Irish playwright Samuel Beckett put it, "Nothing is more real than nothing."
-Simple Abundance May 24th entry (The Fullness of Nothing)
I love that entry from Simple Abundance. To me less is more. I hate clutter and I am constantly going through clothes, and things to give away to make more space for nothing. (I am the opposite of a pack rat and I am definitely not one of those girls who has to have 100+ pairs of shoes or 100+ purses, etc. I only need the basics: i.e. one dress purse and one casual purse (no more purses needed).
The goal I have for our apartment is for it to be clean, organized, and simple (no clutter or schnick schnacks)
I am grateful for all that I have but I have to admit - I am a bit materialistic at times. I wouldn't mind a Steinway Baby Grand and some piano lessons or a ticket to the US whenever I get homesick or want to visit friends/family. ;)
I like that you're on a first-name basis with Chuck Pafightclubguy. Respect.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Scheerer! I've been really disturbed by the apparent push toward a 'childless society' in America, lately. And it's hard not to wish that we had a little bit more of a 'cushion' than we do right now. You do a good job at putting things into perspective and making me feel a little better about myself, when everyone else around me tends to make me ashamed for making the choices we've made.
ReplyDeleteIt'll all work out in the end, right?
Oh yeah Chuck? We go way back.
ReplyDelete